Positively irritating?

I have been hearing alot lately that I am too positive.

Yup. My name is Jennifer and I'm a positive thinking addict.

I have a philosophy that if all you focus on is what has gone wrong, then when you look back at your life that is all you will remember. We have selective memories. We can't remember everything. So why would you choose to remember mostly bad situations and feelings?

I won't do it. I am sticking with my addiction. I know that some people find it irritating that I am always trying to find the bright side, no matter how small. A friend once said to me "Can't you just say 'this sucks and I hate it?'" Of course! And I do. But what should my next course of action be? Wallow? Whine? What will that do for me? Will it put me on the path to recovery or happiness? Or will it spin me down into a woe is me attitude?

It may be harder to look for the silver lining, but aren't you worth the work? You get to choose how you feel. You cannot control other people and their actions/reactions. But you can and should take responsibility for how you act and react. Don't get me wrong, I am not claiming to be perfect. Sometimes I have trouble finding the good things about a situation. But I always get there eventually.

My past is riddled with heartache, trouble and misfortune. And it easily could have consumed me. It is easy to point fingers, place blame and give yourself up as unlucky. For years I spouted the phrase "I am so unlucky! I must have done something horrible in a past life to deserve all this bad luck."

But the hard truth is, you are responsible for the path your life takes. When you are given a challenge, it is because you need to make a change. It is because somehow you have strayed a bit from the path you are supposed to be on. And the only way back is to make the hard choice to salvage something good from the situation.

If you ran into a brick wall, would you try to punch through it, or would you find another way around? Trying to punch through requires alot of energy. And will it be worth it in the end? Or are you punching through a wall only to get to a pack of rabid dogs on the other side?

Take a step back and think about whether this is a self-enriching challenge, or a self-induced challenge. Self-enriching challenges bring you closer to your potential. They challenge you to make improvements to yourself in some way. But self-induced challenges are energy draining blocks in the road.

I know lots of people would say, you don't know MY life. You don't know what I have been through. You don't understand. But I do. And I'd be more than happy to compare battle scars. But only in the spirit of reminding myself how I used those scars to move toward a better life.

Next time you run into a challenge, think about whether this is an obstacle you may have put in your own way. And think about what you can learn from it.

I hope that this does not come off as preachy. It is merely an attempt to put some positive energy into the world. And to let you know that you are not alone.